My Journey With Functional Neurological Disorder

By Aijaz Ahmad Mir 

There is no doubt that health is wealth. Without physical or mental well-being, a person cannot achieve their dreams and goals in life. Our abilities to strive for and achieve what lies in our hearts are greatly influenced by our health. Many individuals with disabilities aspire to have good health in order to pursue their dreams. Although some differently abled individuals have achieved exceptional feats, we cannot generalize these cases. Good health is extremely important for a fulfilling life. It allows us to experience and enjoy life more fully. In addition, good health is essential for living a satisfactory and high-quality life, and it positively affects our relationships with family, friends, peers, and the community as a whole.

Similar to physical health, mental health holds equal importance; in fact, I would argue that mental health is even more crucial than physical health. Indeed, there is a direct correlation between our mental and physical well-being. We can assert that mental well-being is synonymous with physical wellness. I am here to share my story about how I am managing to live with a neurological functional disorder. Conversion disorder, also known as functional neurologic disorder, is a syndrome that manifests neurological symptoms unrelated to any underlying neurological disease or medical condition. These symptoms may result in considerable discomfort and have the potential to impact one’s ability to move or perceive sensory information. Uncertain neurological abnormalities or stress responses may potentially precipitate this condition.

A few years ago, I went for some work, and while walking, I experienced an imbalance. At first, I didn’t think it was an imbalance, but when I started walking consciously, I noticed that I was becoming imbalanced. I also have an anxiety disorder, and while anxiety can contribute to FND (functional neurological disorder), it is not the sole reason. As I struggled with imbalance and difficulty walking, I began to feel anxious, and negative thoughts began to overwhelm me. I thought I might die, and it made me depressed. When I reached home, I told my mother about this incident. She advised me to remain calm, and I would be fine. It made me curious and anxious. I started searching on Google to see why I was experiencing imbalance and dizziness while walking. The search engine showed various reasons for imbalance and dizziness. These included anxiety, diabetes, heart problems, ear problems, brain problems, and vitamin deficiencies. I surmised that my mild ear issue might be the cause. I didn’t believe that it could be due to anxiety. I have been going through anxiety for a long time, but I never felt imbalanced. That was why I rejected the anxiety and imbalance hypothesis in my case.

I initially thought that my imbalance and dizziness might be related to an ear problem. To address this concern, I decided to visit an (ENT) doctor who recommended that I undergo pure-tone testing (PTT). The results showed a slight deafness in my left ear, but the doctor assured me that this wouldn’t cause my balance issues or dizziness. He prescribed some vitamin medication, which I took. After a few days, I felt back to normal – my imbalance and dizziness disappeared, providing me with relief.

However, a year later, while I was attending university, I began experiencing the same problems again. I firmly believe that the significant stress I was under at university triggered this imbalance. I was dealing with high levels of anxiety and stress due to my academic responsibilities. In response, I sought a checkup at the university health center and explained my condition to the doctor. He recommended checking my blood pressure, as he suspected it might be a factor. The reading came back high, and I informed the doctor that I have an anxiety disorder. In turn, the doctor suggested that the elevated reading could potentially be a result of white coat hypertension. This is when stress during blood pressure checks causes certain individuals to experience elevated blood pressure levels. The added stress further increased my anxiety, leading to an abnormal blood pressure reading. I was concerned about the possibility of having a heart attack, stroke, or paralysis, but my main issue continued to be the imbalance and dizziness I experienced while walking. On the following day, I returned to the health center for another blood pressure check, and once again, it was high. The doctor prescribed blood pressure medication and anti-depressants, which I took for a few weeks. While my blood pressure came under control, I still experienced dizziness.

At that time, I was in Hyderabad, and I decided to consult a psychiatrist. I met him and told him my story. He prescribed me Fluvoxamine and Lorazepam. In the past, I used to take fluvoxamine whenever I was experiencing depression, and these medications helped to manage my symptoms. When I began taking Lorazepam, a medication prescribed for anxiety disorders, I experienced a temporary improvement in my dizziness for several days. However, the improvement in my movement imbalance was fleeting, lasting only a few days before it returned. Managing these conditions has consumed more than three months of my time. My condition did not improve, severely impacting my daily life, including my studies and social interactions. Finally, I decided to visit my home for some time and get treatment there for my problem.

I visited a high-profile psychiatrist and neurologist at my home in Kashmir. Both doctors prescribed anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medicines for me to take. However, none of these medications were effective in alleviating my depression, anxiety, or imbalance symptoms. One of the neurologists advised me to get an MRI, which I did and was normal. My brain structure was normal. The medicines they gave me didn’t work well for me. For a long time, I was taking these medicines (anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, blood pressure, and vitamin supplements) and following up with the doctors as advised. But nothing worked for me. I’d been dealing with this mess for nearly a year. At one stage, I felt that I had become disabled and should apply for a disability certificate as early as possible to secure my future. However, I remained optimistic that there would be a treatment available for my disorder.

My father was really concerned about me. He decided to take me to Chandigarh for treatment. Before going to Chandigarh, my father told me that first we should visit Dr. Sushil Razan, a reputed neurologist in Jammu. I was praying to God to show me the right path. After a long struggle, God finally revealed the right path to me. My father took me to Jammu to consult Dr. Sushil Razdan. I was confident that he could treat me well because there were a lot of success stories attached to him. When I entered the doctor’s room and sat in the chair, I noticed that he was patiently and thoroughly checking his patients. I told him the whole story, and he saw all my previous prescriptions and tests. He instructed me to walk straight into the room, and as soon as I did, he noticed that I was becoming imbalanced. He told me that you have a “functional disorder,” but your anxiety is making it worse. He prescribed me two medicines, namely ‘Daxid (sertraline) and Ishpazi 1, and told me to stop all of my previous medications. He advised me to follow up after one month and start taking this medication. I started taking medicines for four weeks in a row. But I found no improvement. However, in the fifth week before consulting a doctor, I experienced improvements in my anxiety, mood, and, above all, my dizziness. When I consulted the doctor online, I told him that just a few days ago, I realized improvements in my dizziness. He told me to take medicine for the next three months. Currently, I am under his care, taking medicines on a regular basis, and thanks to God, I am feeling much better. My physical health and mental health are in a stable state.

According to my experience, you can effectively manage your FND with the right diagnosis. Stress and anxiety were making my FND worse. But when I received the right treatment for my anxiety and stress, my FND improved to a great extent. Now I am feeling normal as usual. However, there are a few days when I experience FND reversal symptoms, mostly due to stress. But thankfully, it is under control most of the time. I would like to extend my gratitude to Dr. Sushil Razdan, who has diagnosed me well.

My journey has taught me that good health, both physical and mental, is truly a cornerstone of a fulfilling life. With the right diagnosis and treatment, it is possible to manage even complex conditions like Functional Neurological Disorder. While challenges remain, my experience has given me hope and a renewed appreciation for the importance of holistic health. I extend my deepest gratitude to Dr. Sushil Razdan for his expertise and care. As I continue on this path, I am reminded that with perseverance and proper support, we can overcome obstacles and lead vibrant, meaningful lives.

• Views expressed in the article are the author’s own and do not necessarily represent the editorial stance of Kashmir Observer. Details mentioned here are strictly for information purposes only. We do not take responsibility for the medications mentioned. Please consult relevant doctors for treatment.

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