By Shahid Qureshi
L isn’t linear. It may land us into unforseen territories we could never have prepared ourselves for and yet It is only in these darkest times that we can discover in ourselves an indomitable human strength and resilience.
I too was positive about my future, full of hopes and ambitions. I had milestones to cross, destinations to reach, vision to fulfill and dreams to realize. My eyes were always on the end of the road as if life would be just what I had envisioned. I was sure about myself, confident and full of pride. I could never have in my wildest dreams imagined that life would abduct me into a traumatic dungeon to struggle with an awful enemy within. I can recall the words of JK Rowling , author of Harry potter “talent and intelligence never inoculated anyone against the caprice of fates” and I can no longer naively suppose even for a moment that life of other people has been an enjoyment of unruffled privilege and ease. There are stories of struggle, of success and of achievement but only the ones which strike and catch our eyes under the glare are sung. Some who make it to headlines and rightfully so are swarmed around for a bite or beelined by fans for an autograph become icons, role models or superheroes. However beyond them are many unsung heros who grapple all alone. in darkness and in silence with nobody around to pat them on their back.
Tinnitus, an invisible enemy, became my constant companion, disrupting the symphony of silence. Its relentless whispers tormented my ears, stealing away moments of peace and replacing them with a cacophony of ringing, buzzing, and hissing. Sleepless nights transformed into weary days, as my mind battled against the unyielding intrusion.
Socially withdrawn in sequestered places, every aspect of my social life, interest at workplace, things I had been passionate about, commitment to dreams and aspirations once cherished, the way I would dress up and even attitude towards people around and towards my own life, everything suffered.
But amidst the darkness, I found strength. I embarked on a journey to understand and conquer this affliction that had taken hold of my life. I sought solace in the stories of others who had faced the same struggle, finding comfort in their resilience and triumphs. The American biographical drama “A beautiful mind” screening the successful struggle of great American Mathematician, John Forbes Nash who fought and came out of the tenacious grip of much severe Schizophrenia infused new strength and enthusiasm into me. Armed with knowledge and determination, I decided to confront my own demons.
Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, as I explored various treatments and therapies. Each step forward carried a glimmer of hope, a belief that liberation from this relentless noise was within my reach. Meditation became my refuge, a sanctuary where I could find moments of respite from the constant auditory assault.
And then, a breakthrough. A therapy that resonated with my being, a melody that harmonized with my soul. Sound therapy, carefully crafted to drown out the discordant tones of tinnitus, breathed new life into my world. The gentle whispers of nature, the soothing melodies of music became my allies in this battle.
As time passed, the volume of the intrusive sounds diminished. The symphony of silence began to reemerge, gradually filling the void left by tinnitus. I rediscovered the beauty of quiet moments, the serenity of a tranquil evening, and the joy of uninterrupted sleep.
My victory over tinnitus did not come without scars. The emotional toll it took on me was profound, leaving behind a trail of anxiety and vulnerability. But through this struggle, I found resilience within myself that I never knew existed. I emerged stronger, with a newfound appreciation for the delicate harmony that exists in the absence of noise.
Today, I stand as a testament to the power of perseverance and the indomitable human spirit and victory of hope over suffering. Though the whispers of tinnitus may occasionally return, they no longer hold me captive. I have reclaimed my life, refusing to let this relentless cacophony define me.
To those still fighting their own battles, I offer a hand of solidarity. Know that you are not alone in your struggle, and that there is hope on the horizon. Let us stand united, warriors against the tyranny of tinnitus, knowing that within us lies the strength to overcome and emerge victorious.
- The author is an educator by profession [email protected]
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