Our society expects us to “behave normally” and that makes me want to question what normal really is. Are we not all unique individuals who live pointedly different lives; having our share of joys and jeopardies in our own exclusive ways. Things that we see and things that happen to us are different from all others. Every single person you meet will know something more than you do or have an experience you never shall; be it a ten-year-old. Our circumstances and the way we deal with them, shape us and every new occurrence changes us a little, brushes up our naivety and rubs off our corners. Every person is born with a special talent and a distinct way of expressing it. Why then do we expect all people to take up similar jobs, be the same people, dress alike and behave in one particular way? What is the control group anyway? Whom should I follow to learn how to style my walk or what to eat for lunch? Who is the perfect model for a boy or a girl? What is the best and the only way to wear a coat or tie a hijab?
Truth has many sides to it, more than one thing can be right at the same time depending on the perspective, depending on which side of light you are on. We can all be right, and all be wrong about a thing simultaneously. Why then do we make lives difficult for ourselves by imposing rules which are unnecessary? It is these self-imposed shackles that ruin lives, prevent transgenders and children with special needs from getting decent education, they prevent exceptionally talented people from pursuing their dream jobs and stop everyone from thinking beyond the conventional. Reminding girls that strength is a manly trait and weakness is more lady-like makes them forever dependent on others and makes them shrink in stature. Harassing girls who dare to ride a two-wheeler leads not only to shattered confidence but also stops other parents from allowing their daughters to grow wings. Well-meaning people often wound deeply with their words when they tell a sporty girl to stop behaving like boys or tell a sensitive boy that he should stop being such a girl.
A society needs ethics and rules which all should abide by. These are above every individual but within this framework, there is freedom, freedom to be who you are without being judged for the style of your walk, the colour of your clothes or any of your other little eccentricities. We all have our eccentricities. They keep us sane and allow us to retain our individuality. I call it eccentricity, others may simply call it personality. Without personality, we are vague shadows of each other and that is mortifying. Without personality, there is no distinction. Our perspectives are sometimes narrowed down to a point where we do not allow others to display their diversity. We, therefore, impose ourselves too forcefully upon others, thereby killing creativity and a natural right to individuality. With no scope for diversity, we paint our sky a dismal grey and then complain about never seeing the rainbow.
The need today is not tolerance because tolerance only means you are polite enough to not say what you think, but acceptance. Acceptance that whatever the other person is up to is none of your business and that he/she is perfectly entitled to do it if it is not hurting anyone. It is time for every parent to teach children forbearance, to reprimand them if they show any tendency for bullying. Same goes for teachers and every responsible citizen.It is time to broaden our horizons and let others take pleasure in the sunrise in their own way. allow ourselves to grow and promise never to clip anybodys wings. Lets jump at opportunities and not to conclusions.
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